Purse matter

I lost my identity yesterday. Along with that, I lost the right to drive (both in India and in the US). I also lost the right to spend money without having any (I believe that’s possible through the use of something called “Credit Cards”). If I ever happen to be jobless in the United States, I have also lost the right to social security.

All of it happened here. The blue placeholders show the possible locations where this mishap could have happened.

The City of Purse Purloiners

I lost my wallet. It could have been pickpocketed. It could have just dropped out of my back pocket. It could have been zapped out of existence by a recital of Vogon Poetry. My credit cards could have been used to purchase blood diamonds. Or worse still. Barbie dolls. Perhaps even Himesh Reshammiyya’s greatest hits CD. The horrific possibilities are endless. I would now need to pay a little more than the usual bribe to the cop who catches me using my cellphone while I am overtaking a water tanker from the wrong side of the road, at 80 kmph. All because my driving license is now possibly being used to create fake IDs for suicide bombers.

Perhaps I should not have written my ATM pin number on the backside of my debit card.

These are interesting times. To cancel my credit card, ABN Amro wanted me to reconfirm my waist size and the length (in millimetres) of my left hand’s index finger. Security, they say.